UNDERSTANDING WOMEN

The following guide has been composed (by “author unknown”) for men to translate what women say into what women really mean.

It’s your decision = “The correct decision should be obvious by now.”

Do what you want = “You’ll pay for this later.”

We need to talk = “I need to complain.”

We need = “I want”

I’m not upset = “Of course I’m upset, you moron!”

You’re so manly = “You need a shave and you sweat a lot.”

This kitchen is so inconvenient = “I want a new house.”

Hang the picture there = “NO, I mean hang it there!”

I heard a noise = “I noticed you were almost asleep.”

Do you love me? = “I’m going to ask for something expensive.”

How much do you love me? = “I did something today you’re really not going to like.”

I’ll be ready in a minute = “Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.  It’s going to be a while.”

What’s wrong?  Nothing = “Everything.”

Okay, okay, so that’s a bit of an exaggeration (translation:  “maybe I can still get out of this without taking too much grief”).  But one of the greatest challenges for men and women is in the realm of communication, isn’t it?  And men, God has given us a tremendous responsibility toward our mates:

“Likewise, you husbands, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.” (I Peter 3:7)

With understanding?  Yes, with understanding.

Thank you, Lord, for the blessing you have given me through my wife.  She is truly the joy of my life.  As I daily try to express my love for her, help me to grow in my understanding of her, my patience toward her, my expressions of appreciation for her, my willingness to admit wrong and my willingness to forgive her.  In Jesus Christ, Amen.

Have a great day!

Alan Smith