Tag Archives: how to retire in style

Things to look forward to in retirement

A few days ago, my parents shared these thoughts about retirement with me:

Question: How many days are there in a week for a retiree?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday

Question: How many retirees does it take to change a light bulb?
Answer: Only one, but it might take all day.

Question: What’s the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There’s not enough time to get everything done.

Question: Among retirees, what is considered to be formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes.

Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer: They’re the only ones who have the time.

Question: What is someone called who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
Answer: NUTS!

Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal.

Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn’t miss work, but he misses the people he used to work with?
Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth.

Question: What do you do all week when you retire?
Answer: Monday through Friday, NOTHING….. Saturday & Sunday, you rest.

I suppose it’s only natural that we all look forward to being able to retire someday (although I do think most of us have a distorted view of what retirement is going to be like). A bigger concern of mine, though, has to do with Christians who seem to be anxious to reach “retirement age” in the church. They can’t seem to wait until they can pass off all their responsibilities to those who are younger so they can just sit back and relax.

Don’t get me wrong — I understand that, as we get older, we may not be able to physically do what we were able to do 30 years ago, but there is much that we can still do. I don’t see any of God’s men or women “retiring” in the scriptures and, in fact, if everyone retired from doing the Lord’s work at the age of 62 or 65, we would have missed out on some of the greatest examples of faith that have been recorded.

So, if you want to look forward to retirement, go ahead. But may we all have the attitude that says, “Whether I’m working or retired, I will serve God with everything I have until the day I die! In fact, I look forward to retirement because it will give me more time to devote to the Lord!”

“O God, You have taught me from my youth; And to this day I declare Your wondrous works. Now also when I am old and grayheaded, O God, do not forsake me, until I declare Your strength to this generation, Your power to everyone who is to come.” (Psalm 71:17-18)

Alan Smith